How to know if you're in love?

Since I'm feeling cheezy today.. I would like to evaluate myself whether I'm really in love based on the criteria mentioned here. I'm not sure whether this is the right measure but there's no harm in trying, right? :) So let me evaluate.

1. You have lasting chemistry and commitment between you and another person.
- CHECK.


2. You may even have butterflies and start blushing and smiling when you see them (in fresh and young love).
- CHECK after almost 8 months of dating. I still have that super *kilig* feeling.


3. You want to know everything about them and their ways from all angles. You talk to them continually, share your ideas and your enjoyable times and events together.
- CHECK at my end though I'm still in the process of squeezing everything out of him.


4. You want to introduce them to everyone and to show them what you have found and are developing together. You always want to talk about them to your friends.
- CHECK.


5. You have understanding for one another and know when something is wrong, like something pressing on the mind of the other.
- CHECK.


6. You spend as much time as possible with each other, and don't want to be apart.
- CHECK.


7. You want to do anything to make them happy.
- CHECK.


8. You get butterflies just hearing their name.
- CHECK.


9. You feel like you're flying when he/she holds your hand.
- CHECK CHECK.


10. You feel like you're in heaven when he/she kisses you.
- CHECK CHECK CHECK.


11. You think to yourself "If no one is perfect, I'd like to know what his/her imperfections are!"
- hmmm.. ?


12. You don't care about the bad stuff about them.
- CHECK.


13. You think about them and dream about them but can't explain to anyone how badly you feel about them.
- CHECK.


14. You can't help but smile when you see him/her.
- CHECK. big smile :D


15. You don't feel embarrassed around them.
- CHECK. He just doesn't know how much I'm proud of him.


16. You're confident around them and not scared to talk to them.
- Of course!


17. You're not scared to admit you love them.
- I can SHOUT to the world how much I love him.


18. You're not scared to admit you love them.
- CHECK. 






so am I in love? go figure. Wanting is different from waiting. 

Erase! Erase!

ERASE! :)

Heartbreak? Heartache?

Am I setting myself into another heartbreak? Can someone get me outta here?

....... hayy :(

Forbidden Love
- almost perfect
- thankful
- scared
- happy
- sad
- thrilled
- will be truly missed
- greatful
- no regrets at all
- fire
- hopefull
- hopeless
- sorry
- trust
- chocolates and flowers
- massage
- food
- beer
- beach
- mall
- phone
- church
- movies
- room

Random Thoughts 2

- why why why?
- how come? how come? how come?
- i just couldn't believe that i'm capable. i know i am EVIL but not as much.
- where will i be by June?
- will my dream job come true?
- how is my squanienie doing in manila?
- what will happen if we ride the same plane?
- is he thinking as much as i do?
- K is not good at all so don't don't. K is a drug. have you ever heard of that?
- when will i find time to do my project?
- i'm excited to graduate and go to AUSSIE! yey! jay, i shall see ya?
- 5 days to go before i turn 21.
- can't stop thinking about tomorrow
- what will happen to us? he's leaving but he OUGHT to leave otherwise....
- how does it feel to text your "honey" but you're holding someone else's hand?
- is it karma? hope it's not.

How's my weekend?

May 8 (Friday) - hanged out at Allan and Archel's room with Lisa, we sang, drunk, and share ghost stories. kuntil anak! hala!

May 9 (Saturday) - went to Ambasador with the tukang gossip (gossip folks).. haha!
- went to somewhere out there with Lisa, Albert, and Antonio. met Mage (he's so mabango! my gosh!) hottah hottah.. first time to try Ks. ;) won't try it again. kaya nga try lang diba? choba dong!

May 10 (Sunday) - woke up late :O mother's day pala. went to church with Allan and Archel. met Leah and john too. we had dinner at Duck King. the boys treated me.

post-weekend:
May 11 (Monday) - took the Unilever's aptitude test. i passed the phone interview. :) had focus group discussion too which didn't lead us to anywhere coz everyone was seeking for the spot light. my goodness! i didn't know that Indonesians can be that AGGRESSIVE. halos makipagsabunutan na sila sa isa't isa! at ang english, jusko! di nila alam paano papakendengin pa! hahahaha! the face-to-face interview was ok, i was able to redeem myself. wish me luck! btw,
traffic was BAD. 1 hour from menteng to kuningan, my goodness gracious!

May 12 (today) - went to work late. it was difficult to find a cab. mba temmy who is my boss' secratary, told me that she has to update me on something. ano kaya yun? gosh! me UBER nerbus!

Realization: Don't eat the words you utter.
Be thankful. :) Hundreds of applicants were there in the testing center yesterday. They've been searching for jobs for many months now. Buti na lang may trabaho ako! Salamat po!

xoxo,
Mummy Gone Wild

P.S. find the hidden message here.

Random Thoughts

I dunno. I miss Ryan. I dunno how to express it further. I find him so numb. He always try not to portray any emotion. This is getting difficult day by day. No assurance on when I will be coming back. Should I go back to Manila soon or what? Everything seems to be unpredictable. One thing is sure, I want a comfortable life. My parents brought me up this way. I dunno if I can learn how to step down a bit. Awhile ago my workmates were telling me that the kost (serviced studio type apartment) where I am moving to on March is expensive coz I earn less than that but my dad will be the one to finance it. It is pretty ironic though. I'm working but all I get from the company is not sufficient to fund my everyday needs. I just use it for shopping. Well, you have to give it to me. I haven't finished university yet and Dad told me that he doesn't like me to stay in a basta basta place since he has been working so hard all this time to give us a comfortable life. I love my dad eventhough he gets toxic at times.

Thoughts are all over my head. I can't express them into words but I can say that I'm pretty scared (not so scared) about the future. Tuition fees are really high and I have to send Daphne to a good school for sure. How am I able to do that on my own? On the other hand, I'm trying to find a way to be financially independent in the near future. Ayoko na may masabi sila sa akin. I wanna stand up with my own feet. Hopefully, I will be able to save up for a comfortable house soon, if ever I will be settling back to Manila or get a relatively good paying job here. What about other countries huh? hmm.. Let's see.

Dad is getting a job! Yay! :D Thank God! It took only a month of waiting. God is great! :) Justice and good karma come back so quick so no need to revenge or anything. yeah that's right. ;)

Btw, my sperm donor offered a child support. I said NO THANKS with my left eyebrow up. haha! I hope I could tell that to him face to face.

Why other people cannot say straight to other people's faces that they are BROKE?

i've been broke for the past 2 weeks because of my sky rocketing phone bill. i never had to make excuses or sugar coat my situation. i brought food at work, skipped after office coffee hangouts. but yeah.. i survived. then there's this boy who was trying to make excuses for his failure to give me ^^^^^^^ this ^^^^^^^^^.. sabi niya, i want to give it to you personally.. yeah right, will wait for that. i'm kinda pissed. ^eyes rolling^

Anti-A**hole Campaign

Why guys can be completely a pain in the ass?
Why do they take advantage of you? Coz you let them to? Come on that's unfair.
Why do they play with your feelings? Try to be close, closer, even "closest" to you and suddenly drop you like a hot potato?
Why do they love playing mind games?
Why do they give us girls false hopes?
Why some of them are insensitive?
Why some of them are irresponsible beings?
Why do they cheat? That's why girls are starting to cheat nowadays.

... and yet we still want them. hahahahahahahaha!

Moral Lesson: Beware of assholes.

J-A-Y

hahaha! i stayed up late last night catching up with him. it was good. i missed him a lot! i used to talk to him until the wee hours of night up until the sun rises in oz. it's just sad that we can never be more than friends.. or maybe we can? who knows..

Hitting two birds in one stone.

If I wanted a new phone, laptop, mp3 player, money, or just free drinks/dinner, I could have had it. :) Why? Tonight is a very interesting, funny, but scary and depressing night. Hmm.. Way back in Manila, I would always hear stories about cheating husbands or wives but I never see a living proof of it so I thought it wasn't that bad. Here I often hear stories, even those people who you least expect to have one has one. Bad bad. Awhile ago I was hanging out with 2 of my friends in Loewy - a resto bar just across our apartment building. As we were having a good chat about relationships, Jakarta, hobbies, and stuff, my friend and I was so surprised to see this Pinoy guy with the rumored young mistress. Aha! She's fat but yah, she looks young. No wonder why people give a second look to me and my dad everytime we walk around the mall. Haha! Well, this guy got a lot to prove specially he's looks. Prolly he cannot get to much attention from people or even his own wife. Haha! It wasn't really a big deal for me because he is a self-proclaimed babaero - womanizer. So we continued our conversation and then, surprise again! One of our family friends, arrive the resto with another girl! Tadah! I knew that their relationship was already on the rocks but I remember him telling that he's trying to patch things up with his wife. Is that his way of trying?

I got a lot of questions in my mind now. Why? Why? Why? Is it? Is it? Is it?